I would have to say that our “Marriage Maintenance” begin before we said our “I do’s” and it began with truth in our communication. We shared openly our secrets, our rough spots, and even our skeletons. We made agreements, understood compromise, respect and our expectations of one another and our union. We became a committed partners.
“It takes a loose rein to keep a marriage tight.” ~John Stevenson
One should understand, that marriage is working selflessly everyday, because although we are united as one, we are still two separate entities. We will have different thoughts, wants, needs, but we work to bring those together…that’s our love. There has never been a day in our lives together that he has not put my feelings before his own. His mantra in our marriage has always been “dear whatever makes you happy,” my feelings and my happiness matter to him. I smile just thinking about that phrase and how often he has said it, meant it, and how much I love him for it.
I have been dating my husband longer than I’ve known him and it is because of this that I can truly say we have become one another’s “best friend.” We still share passion, joy, laughter (oh the laughter), and so much more. What I have enjoyed the most about our marriage is learning how to have a healthy relationship, it was not always easy, but it was definitely worth each of my false starts if it got me here. LOL My husband has taught me to be a better person and I in turn have taught him to be a better partner.
“Are we not like two volumes of one book?” ~Marceline Desbordes-Valmore
My/his achievements are our achievements and our failures are our strengths. We do not have individual achievements or goals, partnerships aren’t built that way. We work to strengthen and lift one another, always. There was a time when I was uncertain about what I wanted to do career wise. I changed jobs more frequently than a hooker changes panties, but he was always supportive of me.
When I wanted to return to school, it was at his insistence that I quit working and focused on completing my degree. Later when I was faced with adversity and illness, it was he that held my hand, wiped my tears and quietly prepared to stand and battle in my defense. He has never flaunted my failures or false starts in my face. I know that he has been my greatest advocate. I wanted to learn a new jewelry making technique (to enhance my skills) he too enrolled in the class and was the only male. When women are bemused and impressed with all he does for and with me, I just smile and say ” yep, that’s my husband.”
As two, we are solid as a rock, but united as one…we have become invincible! We are committing our promise to one another in three weeks. I am both ecstatic and guarded, because one shouldn’t tamper with flawless.
The first time I heard “Lost Without You” I immediately began to daydream and fantasize about husband and wife things. Later, I played it for my husband, ahem immediately I knew that this was the song that was meant to be our husband and wife anthem. Let’s just say, it motivates us in both words and actions.